Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Vote 2008: Winner Declared

With only 10 months left until the election. Im going to pick a winner now. Sure I could poll a select audience with error percentages and talking heads with names like Wolf and Anderson. But lets do it by the much more accurate way. The candidates websites.

John McCain:

Ok we know youre 73 and you're trying to be web saavy, but unlike Ron Paul youre not winning any design contests here. Cluttered with random messages and drop shadows. I feel like I'm visiting my grandfather's blog. His blog consists mostly of stories about onions, so maybe you're a little better off. You should at least put a Viagra ad up there somewhere. Worked for Bob Dole.

5 out of 10 purple hearts.

Hillary Clinton:

Wow. Went a little heavy on the red white and blue huh? What? You're running for president. Oh my mistake. I guess the only thing you're missing is a giant 911 sticker. You have that too? Shit. Well may I commend your web team on one thing? Good use of the standard fonts every web tool gives you. Arial bold = middle class votes right?

6 out of 10 wishes for Bill to change his name and run again.

Barack Obama:

Sweet merciful gods of design. May we please all dream of producing this. Beautiful elegant and damn functional. And that logo. Wow. Im glad he splurged on the site. It shows that white people can't have good presidential websites. I had to wipe my screen from the kiss marks I left. (Don't judge me). Congratulations to Obama's in house team of media designers for this one.

10 out of 10 Rays of Light.

Say hello to the next P.O.T.U.S. Mr. Barack Obama.

1 comment:

Adam said...

"Arial bold = middle class votes right?"

That, good sir, is comedic gold.

I'll ring you later about the 'ish.